Tokyo Blond Is Not Porn

Tokyo Blond is not a porn blog, about hair or even, as one pithy friend remarked, a micro beer or late 1980s glam metal band ("Dude, I just saw Skid Row and Tokyo Blond opened and played a killer set").


The purpose of this blog is to chronicle my experiences in Tokyo - poignantly, visually, irreverently - for fun.


Anybody can tag along...that is if I like you. This blog will endeavor to be entertaining and honest and frequent enough to keep those following interested including me.


Showing posts with label Four Seasons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Four Seasons. Show all posts

Friday, November 4, 2011

Tea for Two

It took a moment for me to recognize what I was looking at, as we crossed the bridge from Edogawabashi station.  We were on our way to the Four Seasons at Chinzan-so, one of two Four Seasons in Tokyo (my kind of town).  I took another doubtful look and sure enough it was a gigantic carp foraging in the murky depths of the river ravine.  How can anything survive in there? I thought it was a flood channel.  It was spumey green and log-jammed with trash and debris.  The fish was gigantic, as big as Ranger the Wonder dog.  I made Russell look too.  He shuddered.

Turns out it wasn't a storm drain but the Kanda River and along it was a delightful park, outlined by cherry trees.  This place must be spectacular during Cherry Blossom season.  It was pretty impressive at the beginning of Fall, with the leaves just beginning to consider turning color.  We made a game out of spotting more fish, accolades given to the largest and ugliest.  There were schools of them and every once in awhile - a beast of cyclopean proportion.  This spawned a friendly debate on whether they were carp or catfish.  Turns out a helpful sign proved us both right.


Gigantic carp - most likely man-eating.
This picture does not do it justice - the thing probably weighs 80 pounds
Ranger only weighs 60 pounds, but he's on a diet.

Cherry tree-lined Kando Riverwalk
Imagine what this must look like in Spring

Lovely little park along the monster-fish invested river

Lovely landscaping

Resplendent with water fountain

And gigantic butterfly

Russell and I practically frolicked along the lovely landscaped path of the park.  The punishing, incessant heat and humidity of Summer had finally burst into Fall.  Like popping a bubble of mint gum, so fresh.  We reveled in it.

The park actually takes you to the garden entrance of the hotel.  I recommend this way.  But we didn't realize this until later and instead walked up the steep set of stairs where the park seemingly concludes because we didn't trust my instincts and relied on iPhone GPS instead.  Sadly, Russell is addicted to this app.  It did, finally, get us there, but in a much more circuitous and less picturesque way.  

I did not expect the hotel to be that beautiful.  I mean I saw the pictures and I read about the 7 lectares (17 acres) of historic Japanese gardens but I didn't realize it would be like this.  The place is dreamy.  It encompasses the best of traditional Japanese architecture and horticulture. It's like Walt Disney took the best of Japan and placed it one beautiful setting, you know, like Cinderella's castle.  I've been to Germany.  I've seen the Mosel River Valley and Neuschwanstein Castle.  I get it.  If I ever have any visitors; I'm taking them here.

Besides checking another Four Seasons off my list, although technically I have to stay there for it to really count (are you reading this Russell?), we were going there for tea.  We'll pretty much go anywhere for a decent high tea. The scones were outstanding: pumpkin, fig and plain.  But there was nothing plain about this tea, except maybe us.  We were slightly under-dressed.  Typical Americans.  Hey!  At least we weren't wearing tennis shoes and baseball caps.

The list of teas and coffees is extensive.  Russell blithely pointed out they even offered Kopi Luwak coffee.  That um, supremely expensive, literally crappy coffee featured in the movie The Bucket List.  It's made with coffee beans that have been eaten by the Asian Palm Civet (a small, carnivorous mammal that looks like a gigantic rat) and "passed through" the animal's digestive system.  I'm not shitting you.  Sorry I couldn't resist.
If you don't believe me, see for yourself:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak

No, we did not order this.  I had Early Grey with cream, thank you very much.  And Russell, in true Russell fashion, had a fruity tea.  The only thing that would have made Russell happier would be if it came with an umbrella.  What can I tell you - the guy likes frou-frou drinks, hot or cold - a personality trait I love about him.

Our high tea caddy and requisite champagne.
Doesn't "High tea" really mean "Champagne"?

We noted we were the only Americans in the joint.  There was a European guy with an Asian girl next to us, trying to make time, but other than that the entire hotel was crowded with Japanese.  Most of them were dressed up.  The tea was nice but it was even nicer just to watch the hotel patrons.  A lot of them were wearing formal kimono's.  It just added to the dreaminess of the surroundings.  I really felt like I was in Japan, not Tokyo, Japan.  

After lunch we walked around the hotel and surrounding grounds.  We counted no less than five, yes five, weddings going on simultaneously.  Some of them were traditional - the bride and groom arrayed in  exquisite kimonos.  Others were modern, although apparently Tokyo brides prefer much frillier gowns than what's worn in America.  They looked like porcelain dolls imbedded in a frothy, sugary confection of ruffles and lace.  The wedding guests were equally intriguing to watch in ornamental kimonos, their hair done in elaborate spirals and curls.  It was cool.  I could have watched for hours.

The grounds surrounding the hotel were equally impressive.  Artifacts from all over Japan have been carefully and thoughtfully placed throughout the garden including a 1,000 year old pagoda from the Hiroshima mountains.  The place looks like what I had imagined Japan would look like, Japanese maples dripping across still waters, whispering of centuries.  Graceful bridges traversing babbling brooks, lead to tiny tea houses with tatami mats and ancient lanterns, like a scene from Shogun.  They say in Summer you can sit in one of the traditional restaurants by the pond and watch the fireflies dance.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinzan-so_Garden


Happy Russell on whimsical red bridge

One of many traditional Japanese restaurants on the property.
Looks like stepping into the pages of Shogun



1,000 year old pagoda


Um, this structure is like five times older than the United States

It's a well.  What stories it could tell.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Spa Me, Feed Me, Hose Me Down

The toughest decisions while on vacation at the Four Seasons Koh Samui were beach or pool, wine or cocktail, 90 or 120 minute massage.    Decisions, decisions.

First decision - 90 minutes.  Couples massage.





Spa reception


100 stairs led to one of five treatment rooms.  
You needed treatment by the time you climbed the stairs in the heat.

They told us to undress and put on the robes provided, and when we were ready, to ring the bell.  But halfway through undressing they knocked on the door and handed us two sheer pieces of fabric that looked suspiciously like underwear.  They were underwear.  They were so sheer  - why bother?  Was it to make us feel comfortable or them? I have to say Russell looked adorable in them.  I wanted to post a picture but for some reason he wouldn't let me.  I brought them home as a souvenir and to make him wear again later.  Tee hee.  

When we were properly attired, we rang the bell.  Our attendants came in and washed our feet in coconut oil and kafir lime leaves, then led us into the inner sanctum where we had a 90 minute couples massage.
It was outstanding even with the underwear.

 The bell and the foot bowls. I think I need these at home.
Now, who can I get to wash my feet?


The stairs back down to reception.
I need a nap now.  Lay me down on the beach.

Oh here's the beach now.

Poolside or beach side - what to chose?

You're right Russell - cocktails first

Then pool

Later we decided to go into town for some local fare.  But first a sunset cocktail at the bar.  We tried a local wine.  Who knew Thailand makes wine?  We tried a rather refreshing rose.  Not bad at all.  Of course anything would have been refreshing in this heat, if it were chilled.  There was a couple and their kids sitting in the bar when we got there.  I thought it odd they would bring kids into the bar but Russell pointed out it was early.  True.  Then their youngest started whining.  Soon the whining turned to screaming.  "Ma Mere, Ma Mere....!!!!!"  I discovered, even in French, whining is annoying.  You would think the couple would remove the screaming kid.  Mais Non!  But no, why would they?  

Would someone please turn down the volume on the whining kid behind me? 
 Either that or pour me another glass.
Hell, pour the kid a glass.

We decided to move onto dinner.  The spa manager recommended a beachside restaurant in Koh Samui's storied Fisherman Village.  It was like a mini Bangkok but with more stray dogs and cats.  One side of the street were family run shops; the other, on the beach side, were open air bars and restaurants.  Entire families were watching Thai soap operas while foreigners perused their goods laid out under tarps in make-shift shops.  And it was ungodly moist.  I was sweating profusely, even with the fan turned on us by our waiter.  Stray cats did reconnaissance on freshly seated diners.  "Wait I think I got a live one here!"  Soon hordes of hungry cats gathered for scraps of BBQ fish.   Guys on the beach tried to sell tourists sky lanterns, otherwise known as Kongming Lanterns, that waft romantically into the air and glow diaphanously in the night sky.  They're beautiful when afloat but apparently not exactly environmentally friendly.

Russell had the seafood special: shrimp, muscles, mystery fish.  I had BBQ'd rock lobster.  They would have been great but it was so oppressively humid and smokey (apparently Thailand attracts chain smokers) that any pleasure derived turned into a sweaty, smokey stream of perspiration that permeated our clothes and ran down our backs in rivulets of regret.

But at least we can say we went into town.  Yeah, I won't need to leave the resort for the rest of the week now.  Thank God we have a plunge pool.  I may not even bother to take my clothes off.

I like this sign.  Very definitive.
I can't vouch for it though.

Probably the only non-stray dogs I saw.

Can a brother get a piece of fish?

This could be good if I wasn't drowning in my own sweat.
Somebody please just hose me off!!!















Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Um, This Might be Even Better than the Four Seasons in Hawaii

Ok, I confess, so I cajoled Russell into going to Koh Samui so we could stay at yet another Four Seasons.  But hey, every room comes with its own plunge pool, and at less the price than other high end hotels. I've always wanted to stay in a room with its own plunge pool but they're usually in the thousand plus per night range.  I'm not paying that unless my room comes with entertainment if you know what I mean.

So after exploring all the Four Season options in Thailand, we chose Koh Samui.  I'd really like to go to the Golden Triangle (which is an all inclusive elephant safari complete with tents), but that really is way too expensive. Maybe for a special occasion using lottery money.  Course I would have to play the lottery first.

We flew Bangkok Airlines from Bangkok to Koh Samui.  They advertise themselves as a "boutique" airline which I found kind of interesting.  I wondered what they meant by "boutique." I almost fainted when they served us a full hot, egg breakfast on the plane.  The flight was only an hour!

In America they don't feed you unless the flight is six hours and during a meal time.  But for your convenience, of course, you can purchase a snack.  For a little more you can even buy a drink.  How nice.

This is the breakfast they served us during the one hour flight.
Nice ribbon.

This was my roll.  What does it look like to you?
I agree.

The airport was boutique too.  It was so cute.   It reminded me of the Kauai airport or the Disneyland parking lot.

Control tower.  There's only one runway
so I guess that's why it's only three stories.

The runway under whimsical blue skies.
Suddenly I feel like I'm on vacation.

Tram from the runway to the terminal. So old school.
"I think we parked in the Cinderella section, honey"

The terminal was bordered with ponds and flowers.
Pond would be good for you.

Clock tower leading to a little boardwalk of duty free shops.
How convenient. 

Since we were both a little wary of traveling in Thailand, we opted for the Four Seasons delivery service, us being the delivered.  They picked us up in a Mercedes with ginger laced ice cold towels and fresh bottles of water.  Thai music wafted from the sound system.  They dropped us off in the Four Seasons' courtyard.  

At first I thought this was Hear No Evil, See No Evil, 
but it was four monkeys praying for more tourists.

A door opened into a little room with an expansive view.  It took our breath away.  Now this is what I call awesome!

OMG! This is heaven, not registration.
This little room perched on the highest point above
the resort with a commanding view of the
 Gulf of Thailand was the welcome reception. 

More cold towels, this time laced with 
lemon grass and a fragrant flower ring for me.

Chilled dragon fruit juice overlooking heaven completed our welcome.

Then a golf cart took us to our room.  Yeah, I don't think we'll be leaving the resort any time soon.

Entrance to our room.

From the gate, down the stairs...

Into this!
I get the lounger on the right!

Bedroom

Bathroom with his and...

her sinks

My bathtub.  This one's a keeper.
They had even prepared a fragrant bath,
coconut oil, rose petals and jasmine.
All I had to add was warm water and me.

Shower

Other side of the patio

View from the plunge pool.
Yeah, this don't suck.

First we had to have a sunset cocktail.

The open air lobby.
Each of those lounge chairs has a game in it.

The sunset from the lobby.

Candle lit path

Outdoor dining area

Bar

Happy bar stool warmer

Cocktails



Then to the Thai BBQ on the beach.  The food was outstanding.  


We sat on a table in the sand, front row to the evening's entertainment.
This guy was hot. Sorry, I couldn't resist the pun.

Lucky shot.  I must be buzzed.

Thai dancers in rainbow colors.
This way to the bar....